I was chatting to a friend earlier this evening, and to my utter disbelief he was complaining about not having any work to do.

“Such is the price of having worked hard all term”, said he.

“**\* *****”, said I.

But I think on one level he was serious, and it set me thinking what an important life skill is lacked by the conscientious few. However modest I may be, it would be foolish to pretend I am anything but a world authority on procrastination in all its forms, and I have decided to share my wisdom. For those of you drawn to work for lack of alternative, I say cast down your lecture notes. Set aside that book and ponder that tricky calculation at a more appropriate time. Constructive activity be damned! The secret of inner peace is not to travel the arduous road to enlightenment, but to curl up next to the path and have a nap.

“You must be the change you wish to see in the world.”

The way to true sloth comes not from without, but must be drawn from a deep well of inner indolence. Many aspiring slackers look to construct an environment of inactivity around themselves without first addressing their own state of mind. The human brain is capable of hundreds of thousands of calculations every minute, but the true slacker can track his cerebral activity on the fingers of one hand, leaving the other free for scratching. Cease all but the most vital mental functions and you will soon find any instinct toward constructive activity fading gently away.

As a practical example of never doing today what can be delayed until tomorrow, I can reveal that I wrote the start of this post in December 2004.

Here endeth the lesson.